Super Binder Sunday

Unlike many Americans, instead of spending yesterday with friends watching the Super Bowl, overanalyzing commercials, and pigging out on snack foods, I rested, reorganized class notes, and made a schedule for the week.

During this time of regrouping yesterday, I realized that the 1-inch binder I bought from Fred's last week wasn't going to cut it for all of my class handouts.  I decided to visit Wal-mart and pick up a 2- or 3- inch binder to satisfy my organizational needs.

Finding a partner to go to Wal-mart with me wasn't easy.  It was, after all, Super Bowl Sunday, and a lot of my friends were hanging out together.  After a few failed attempts to sucker someone into joining me on my trip, I decided to brave the 15 minute commute to Wal-mart and the binder quest all alone.

Initially, I was a little fearful about going to Wal-mart (in Laurens, nonetheless) at night by myself.  As I pulled into the gigantic parking lot many thoughts were playing through my mind.  Would I be abducted?  Sold into slavery?  Stuck in the trunk of some psychopath's car with duct tape binding my mouth shut?

Ok...well as I parked and walked into Wal-mart I only noticed women exiting the store.  Beginning to feel relieved at the sight of a feeble, hunched-over, 80- or 90- year old woman walking to her car, I fiercely entered the Wal, so confident that I even greeted the employees near the door.

After briefly examining some flowers at the front of the store that were on display for Valentine's day, I made my way to the school supply section.  I picked up a 2-inch white binder (Wal-mart has a very disappointing binder section, just for the record), checked out the arts and crafts aisle, and the book aisle, and found myself next perusing the music/dvd section of the store.  (Sometimes you can find CDs or DVDs for only $5...what a steal!)

As I was looking at all of the crappy DVDs, I heard a buggy pulling up behind me.  No big deal.  Then a voice..."Well Hello there, how are you doing??"  Ok...no big deal.  I turned around to find a stranger talking to me!!  Next I take myself back to elementary school...all those reminders to never speak to strangers.  I make up some quick, average response "Finethankyouhowareyou" and steer myself to the next aisle.  Then, all of a sudden, creeper follows me there too!!

ONE OF MY GREATEST FEARS BEGINS TO COME TRUE!! AHH!!

Suddenly, a $5 CD becomes my last priority.  I walk briskly to the checkout, subtly peering over my shoulder every few nanoseconds to verify that I'm not being stalked.  I go to the 20 item or less checkout, pay in cash, and my 2-inch binder and I make a quick run to the car.  I press the unlock key on keychain, praying that it will actually work because oftentimes it malfunctions, get in the car, lock the doors again, and in colloquial terms...put the pedal to the metal!!  As I try to decide whether or not to take a secret route (that I haven't even yet discovered) back to Clinton in order to lose my stalker, I check my rear view mirror only to realize that nobody's behind me.  I'm safe.

As I retold this story to Ash in bed last night, we both giggled at how silly I was.  Then she asked me what time I went to Wal-Mart...I told her it was around 8 pm.  She started laughing profusely and said that should be the punchline of the story.  And so followers...there you have it.